Oh gosh, it's been WAY too long since my last weight-loss update, I know, I know. I have to say that I kind of did it on purpose :) My first weight loss post addressed all my crazy issues... along with my first 30lb weight drop, my next update was all about finding the strength to keep going, and my last progress report focused on the importance of literally working your BUTT off, to reach your goals.
Since the last picture update I had was at my 30 pound mark, I wanted to DOUBLE the weight loss, for a more noticeable change, and well... 30 MORE pounds takes a few months to lose. ha! So here it is, all you fabulously supportive people! As of last week, I am officially 60lbs lighter than I was 6 months ago!!!
I had a friend ask me at the beginning of this month:
"Seriously... How are you staying motivated?
Aren't you SO sick of the gym?"
I know that everyone says you're "SUPPOSE" to start liking (or at least not minding) the gym after a few months, once you're in a routine... but guess what? I go almost everyday and to tell you the honest to God truth...I still hate every sweaty, painful, fat-bouncing MINUTE of it!
I said this to my friend, and followed it up with...
At the risk of sounding completely shallow, the fact that I can wear and do things that I've never been able to experience before, is now the ONLY reason that I keep going on this weight loss journey, most of the time. I don't really EVER hear people discuss this next topic I'm about to touch on, but I thought I'd talk a little bit about what kinds of "results" from my weight loss that I've been enjoying the most, these past few weeks.
* Crossing my legs:
Yup, as embarrassing as this is to admit, up until about a month ago, I've never really been able to comfortably cross my legs. "Something" would always get in the way, and eventually, no matter how hard I focused on keeping one of my chubby trunks over the other, I would ultimately end up in more of a "side sit" or "ankle cross" because actually crossing my legs, one knee over the other like everyone else, just didn't feel natural OR comfortable.
As a side note: I know that crossing your legs isn't technically good for you (don't ask me why...something about veins) but let's all admit, it just looks good, no?
* Wearing smaller sized jewelry and shoes:
I've always been SO focused on losing my belly, or back fat, that I'd never entertained the idea that your feet/ankles and wrists/hands could and WOULD lose weight right along with the rest of your body too!
Even though it was completely awkward at the beginning of my weight loss, I'm SO HAPPY that I took measurements of all my different parts, so that I can see how MUCH I've shrunk!
I've gone from an 8.5 (wide) shoe size, to a 7.5. I've lost about 1 inch off of each ankle, almost 3/4 inch off of each wrist, and none of my rings fit me anymore. ha! I've even come to the point where I'm having to wrap tape around the back of my wedding ring, to keep it from slipping off. I haven't taken measurements for a few weeks, but as of last month,
I was officially down 46 inches total!!!
* Starting to wear shirts that have letters in front of them, instead of numbers & pants that start with a 1, instead of a 2:
If you've ever worn plus-size clothing, then you will totally know what I'm talking about. ha! But for those of you who haven't, plus size clothing comes in 1x, 2x, 3x, 4x... and so on. It was about a month and a half ago that I was walking through Old Navy with Cason and the girls, when I spotted a cute tank top across the store in the women's section. I knew from lots of past experience with Old Navy that they only carry their plus size clothing online, but something about the shirt drew me over anyway. Just as someone who's never been plus-size wouldn't know how to buy larger clothing, someone like me, who has never been a "regular size" didn't know anything about standard sizing. So I flipped through the shirts, heading straight to the back and pulled out an XXL. I had a long-sleeved t-shirt on that day, so I thought I would just slip it over my head to see if it would fit. I took a quick glance around me in all directions, to make sure there wasn't anyone watching, for the fear of this becoming a case of "big girl is awkwardly stuck inside a shirt that she thought she could fit in, but can't, and now she's frantically trying to free herself from the garment, while little ripping noises are being made by the poor shirt in the process"
... ugh. If you've never been in that situation, count yourself lucky.
Aaaaaanyway, as I slid the shirt quickly over my head, I was suddenly aware that I WASN'T stuck inside, like a modern day Houdini-in-straight-jacket act, but that in fact, the shirt was TOO BIG! So I took the shirt off, flung it over to the nearest table display and snagged an XL instead. It slipped on with ease, but this time it felt juuuuust right.
Warning: This is where things get dramatic.
Forgetting my purse on the ground, or the fact that ANYONE was watching me, I scrambled to find the nearest mirror around the store. I'm sure I looked like a panic-stricken Mom searching for a missing child, but I didn't care. Once I located a mirror, I stood in front of it, turning this way and that way, holding my arms out, and even double checking the size on the shirts tag. Once I had confirmed with myself that I was truly wearing a "normal sized shirt" even if it was still an XL, I set out on a dead RUN to find Cason. Short of trampling a small child and tripping over a basket of colorful soccer balls on display, I finally spotted him near the wall of girls flip-flops. We made eye contact and a worried look came across his face, as I tried to race towards him. Before even thinking twice, I yelled out...
"LOOK! I CAN FIT IN NORMAL CLOTHES NOW!!!"
I don't know if it was because I was totally humiliated that I had just yelled this little fact out in front of about 15 people, who now thought I was crazy, or because I honestly couldn't remember the last time I EVER wore an XXL or XL, for that matter, but I started welling up with accomplished, proud, happy tears of joy... right there in the middle of the bathing suits and flip-flops, further embarrassing my poor husband even more.
For so long I had convinced myself that I was happy, no matter what size my clothes were. I was confident in my personality and who I was inside...but it took that (totally embarrassing) breakdown at Old Navy, and a heart to heart chat with my good friend Kami, to make me realize that this weight-loss journey wasn't just about "getting skinny"... it was about me appreciating and then creating something beautiful, with the amazing body that God had given me.
Even though I've still got a long road ahead of me on this crazy-emotional weight loss journey, I know that making the choice to just DO IT, and STICK to it, was the best thing that I've ever done for myself. I can honestly say that EVERYTHING seems better in life (even the hard stuff), when you look and feel GREAT!