Within minutes I was crying and laughing all at once, and I knew I had to share it with you too, because as women, I think we all feel these things from time to time.
Excerpt from Glennon @ Mommastery:
Explaining to your Husband how your day was.
"It was the best of times and the worst of times. There were moments when my heart was so full I thought I might explode, and there were other moments when my senses were under such intense assault that I was CERTAIN I’d explode.
I was both lonely and absolutely desperate to be alone.
I was saturated—just BOMBARDED with touch and then the second I put down the baby, I yearned to smell her sweet skin again.
I was simultaneously bored out of my skull and completely overwhelmed with so much to do.
Today was too much and not enough. It was loud and silent. It was brutal and beautiful. I was at my very best today and then, just a moment later, at my very worst.
Husband—when your day is completely and totally dependent upon the moods and needs and schedules of tiny, messy, beautiful kids, your day is ALL OF THE THINGS and NONE OF THE THINGS, sometimes within the same three minute period.
But I’m not complaining.
This is not a complaint, so don’t try to FIX IT.
I wouldn’t have my day Any.Other.Way. I’m just saying—it’s a really hard thing to explain—an entire day with lots of babies/kids.
But I'm too tired to say all of that. So I just cry, or yell, or smile and say “fine,” and then hand the kids over to you, and run to Target to wander aisles aimlessly, because that’s all I ever really wanted.
But I’d be a little sad because love is about really being seen and known and I wasn’t being seen or known then. Everything is really hard to explain. It makes me feel lonely."
Summer is really kickin' my booty you guys. I feel like by the time Cason gets home at the end of the day, I'm a hot freakin' mess.
Sure, working outside the home was stressful, hard, time consuming and I wouldn't go back unless I really had to... but this SAHM stuff is even MORE emotionally and mentally exhausting then I remember.
The amount of fighting, whining, crying, teasing, complaining, yelling, silly forced giggling (yes, that can actually get annoying too), pushes me over the edge on certain days!
I know, I know... I should really cherish these moments (and I DO!)... some more than others.
And no, of course I didn't yell and threaten no more swimming for the entire Summer to two 9 year olds and a 7 year old, if they didn't close their eyes and lay still for an hour........ I'm a "nice" Mom.(insert sarcasm here)
I know they grow up too fast, believe me, I'm not wishing them "away" one tiny little bit... but can I just get an "AMEN" to the Everest sized mountain of patience and understanding that goes into dealing with kids at home ALL day?
MAJOR respect for all of the working and SAHM's.
You guys are so amazing.
So many of you are making it look so easy.
You go ahead and lose your cool in the middle of Walmart/Target/the Mall parking lot with your 6 year old - because guess what? WE'VE ALL BEEN THERE.
This parenting stuff takes a major toll on us Women, and even though we KNOW we're amazing, it's hard to really explain how we're feeling at the end of the day to our husbands or significant other; in the hopes of trying to fill up our sometimes empty cup, just to turn around and do it all over again tomorrow.
It's All of the Things and None of the Things.
Being present, loving and caring for my kiddos is EVERYTHING that's important... but it sometimes feel's like nothing got accomplished at the same time.
I wonder if that's just me, and my unrealistic expectations for the day... or if other Momma's feel that way too (?)
I've wanted so badly to work on my house this Summer, write up a billion posts and spend lots of money I don't have on lots of furniture that I really want (muah ah ah!)... but that just ain't happenin'.
And while sometimes I'm disappointed at all that could/should of gotten done during a regular 12 hour day, and what actually DID happen... I know that it will all even out in the end.
Soooo... the offie is coming along. LOL.
Next blog post... entry and hallway molding update - whoohoo! I'm SO EXCITED for this!